The Key to Longevity

My grandfather passed away last week, just shy of his 92nd birthday.  Over the years, he taught me copious critical principles about life - how to treat others; the value of family; what it means to be a strong person; and many other lessons that aided the building of my foundation.  But I think the most important thing I learned from my grandfather is what I've come to understand is the key to longevity, and that is this: 
 

Learn to amuse yourself.  

Life is really funny if you choose to view it that way.  So whoop it up.  Here are a few suggestions on how to do so.

Baby elephants do it like this.  Humans have to improvise.

(1) Play with your food.   If you love soy sauce, go ahead and take a swig straight from the bottle.  At restaurants, throw back those little creamers like they're shots.  Have fun with pancakes.  My grandfather made them shaped like bunnies.  Several years ago, when my father was engaged in fierce warfare against squirrels (they wouldn't stay off our bird feeders) and the one-sided battle was causing him to descend slowly into madness, my grandfather alleviated his angst by making him a pancake in the shape of a squirrel.  

I think chopping the thing into pieces and devouring it made Dad feel much better.  He may have even stopped shooting the squirrels at that point.

My sister, having clearly internalized our grandfather's teachings, 
imitates the face on her beet.

(2) Decide that something pretty common, like farting, is hilarious.  That way, everyday life will offer plenty of opportunities for hysterical laughter.  This guy almost brought about my grandfather's demise years ago:

I've never seen anyone laugh so hard.  Whenever my grandfather had to pull out his handkerchief to mop the tears from his face, I think he rolled his life clock back two weeks.  And he did that an awful lot.

One of his favorite Christmas presents

Christmas morning story time with the grandkids

(3) Recognize that the human face can do really fun things, and take advantage of that fact.

Stick pinwheels in a lady's hat, make a silly face, and call it good

Or, in lieu of a lady's hat, go with a paper crown and put napkin rings in your eyes

Show your appreciation for the nose hair-frying power of bourbon balls

(4) When playing games, kick ass and take names.  Don't give the younger generations any false sense of entitlement by letting them achieve victory, as annihilating those several decades younger than you can be particularly entertaining.
  

Here he is slaughtering me in dominoes

...and again

It's true my grandfather did other things that allegedly promote a long life, like watching his diet and staying active.  But my grandmother, on the other hand, eats nothing but ice cream, Goldfish crackers, grilled cheese, and chocolate, hasn't exercised since 1943, and is healthy as a horse.

Here she is realizing she doesn't have to do anything doctors recommend

And that's how I know the true key to longevity.  My grandmother understands that life is funny, and I believe that's what keeps her heart and mind going.  Clearly the nutrition/exercise crap is purely secondary.