Grosser Than Gross

When I was in third grade, my teacher told the class that he would give a prize to any student who could make him laugh.  He sat us in a semi-circle around him, and we all took turns telling jokes and doing silly dances, but no one could get him to laugh.  Finally, after about twenty minutes (which felt more like ten hours to my eight year-old self), one of my classmates told him this joke:

Q:  What's grosser than gross?
A:  When you open the refrigerator, and your rump roast farts in your face.

Well, that did it.  The teacher laughed so hard he fell off his chair.  I didn't find the joke very funny, especially since I didn't know what a rump roast was, but it was pretty awesome seeing my teacher collapse on the floor in a fit of hysterics.

This experience has been brought back to mind because I just discovered what is really and truly grosser than gross.  And here it is:

When you open your mouth guard case and find it crawling with ants.

"Hey, did ya hear about the delicious new snack in the bathroom?  Follow me!"

Yes, indeed.  I think I'm going to have the heebie jeebies for the rest of my life.  Or I may just die now from a revulsion overdose.