Best of the Least

The other day, I was introduced to an adorable creature with a rather pathetic name.  It's called the Least Weasel.  I'm not sure if it's so named because it's the smallest carnivorous mammal, or (because there are so many of them) it's classified as "Least Concern" by the International Union for Conservation of Nature.  (This begs the question - how does the IUCN classify humans?  Seems like we should be in the "Least Concern" category numbers-wise but the "Most Concern," or "HOLY FUCKING SHIT - LOOK OUT!!" category impact-wise.)

Anyway, Least Weasels are both cute and ferocious.  Despite their teeny size, they eat things ten times bigger than they are, and when there's plenty of food available, they choose only to eat their prey's brains.  How badass is that?

Just in case you were wondering what comes up if you search for "badass weasel"

(Interestingly, that search also brought forth several pictures of President Obama.  I had no idea he was a badass weasel.)

After discovering the existence of the Least Weasel, I thought it would be fun to write a children's book about this marvelous creature.  I considered titling it Best of the Least and having it feature a young Least Weasel on a quest to discover how to be the best Least Weasel she can be.  But I soon realized I would never write such a book and decided just to do a quick blog post instead.  Much easier, and no literary agents or publishers required.

So don't forget, folks - even if you're teeny tiny, you can still totally kick butt and eat brains.  Don't ever let anyone tell you different.

"Yeah, I know I look cute, but I will fuck you up."